W ~ Wrong Actions For The Right Reasons

Ace and I had 3 gay friends, namely Adam, Will, and Royce. They are Ace's office mates and they are all effeminate. Ace introduced me to them on January of 2012. Since then, we became close friends. However, this story will focus on Adam.

Adam was a great friend. There's no doubt about it. Every time Ace was out of the country, he was my usual companion. He has a car so we often took road trips, usually in Tagaytay since it is the nearest tourist destination. He gave sensible advices when we had problems. He knew how to cheer us up when we're down. Whenever someone needed to go somewhere important, he would volunteer to drive. He was a trusted and reliable friend; he was always there when we needed him.

Our friendship with him started to spiral downwards in the middle of the year.

One day, Adam brought a guy named Tristan in our weekly gathering. Tristan is tall, handsome in a slightly feminine way, mestizo, straight-acting, and has a good body built. Honestly, if you will compare the latter to the former who is short, fat-bellied, and moreno (though Adam is cute in some way), you would think that Tristan is an escort hired by Adam. Well, that's what I thought at first.

We got curious so we threw questions at him, asking when, where, and how did they meet. He told us without batting an eyelash, saying that they had a common friend which introduced them to each other. He also said they are only friends and nothing more. However, I couldn't shake the feeling that his story was kinda shady. I noticed the discrepancies in it. I felt that, somehow, due to reasons yet unknown, he was lying to us. But I decided to ignore it. I didn't want to ruin the mood of our get-together.

After that night, we noticed that Adam had changed little by little. He became less bubbly and more reserved, usually just sitting idly in one corner while the group was in an active discussion. His time for us became less and less with every passing week, until he was no longer attending our hang outs. He always had an excuse every time we invited him. Soon, it also became harder for us to communicate with him; he doesn't reply to any of our text messages. It was clear that something was wrong, and no one knows why, except for Royce.

One day, Royce told us the truth; that Adam met Tristan via PlanetRomeo, and that Tristan is actually an escort for a living. That's why I was feeling skeptic when I heard Adam's story; it was all a lie. He didn't want us to judge Tristan.

According to Royce, when he saw Tristan that night, he was sure that his face was familiar. Then he remembered that, years ago, he also met Tristan on the same site. They went out, then Tristan offered him sex in exchange for money, but he refused; he had no idea that Tristan is an escort until that very moment. He thought a good-looking guy was just genuinely interested in him. Well actually, he wasn't entirely wrong. Tristan was truly interested all right, although not exactly with him per se, but with what's inside his wallet. Royce never saw him again after that until Adam brought the guy. Royce kept quiet that time because he didn't want to embarass Adam. Maybe that was also the reason why Adam lied to us; he was ashamed of truth.

However, what shocked us the most was that Adam had fallen in love with Tristan. That's why he had given most of his time to Tristan and less to us. He was trying to hog all of Tristan's attention so that the latter wouldn't have the opportunity to escort for anybody else. He made it a point to be with Tristan for almost 7 days a week, with Adam's work performance being affected as well. He even stalked Tristan on some days they weren't together. Adam became obsessed, neglecting to take care of himself. The last time Royce saw Adam, he had lost a lot of weight; he looked pitiful.

Royce once quipped, "Patay na patay ang lola mo kay Tristan. Bantay sarado nya. After nung ipakilala sa atin, iniwas na niya yung tao, kasi daw baka daw tayo alukin ng sex. Natatakot siyang maagawan. Gusto nya sa kanya lang. Eh ito tuloy si Tristan, hindi na alam kung saan kukuha ng pera. Eh paano ba naman, pinatigil nya ang kabuhayan ng tao, pero hindi naman niya inaabutan ng datung. Ano ine-expect nya? Na ititigil ni Tristan ang trabaho nya para sa kanya because of true love?"

To which Will replied with, "Ah ganon? Ano tingin nya sa atin, ahas? Aba, ang haba ng hair nya ha. Well, ganyan talaga ang pag-ibig. Kahit gaano ka katalino, kapag tinamaan ka, bubulusok pababa ang IQ mo."

After several months, we just heard from Royce that Tristan finally dumped Adam. Apparently, Tristan had given up because of our friend's crazy behavior. He wanted his old life back so he ended things with Adam. After that, Adam sought our company. He needed our presence to overcome his suffering. However, we were badly hurt with the way Adam treated us. He ditched us for some guy not even deserving of his time and attention. In addition, he even suspected us of having an ulterior motive towards Tristan!

So we did what we thought was right. The damage had been done. We avoided and ignored him the same way he did to us. No one gave him even an ounce of attention. We changed our usual hang out place without telling him. We had parties without inviting him. We went on trips without him. We wanted to teach him a lesson.

Well, Adam got his lesson all right. Eventually, he disappeared, abandoning his efforts to reconnect with us. We didn't really care about this, since we already became used to him not being around. However, thinking about it much later, I had a sudden epiphany.

I realized we didn't do what a good friend should. We actually sucked being a friend. If we were great as we thought we were, then we should've stuck with Adam. It was a mistake to abandon him when he needed us the most. A friend should be a friend not only in good times, but in bad circumstances as well. One of us became blinded by love, and we were too shallow to understand that. The least we could do was hear his apology and give him a second chance. And, from then, try to rebuild what was broken. It was the first time that that happened, and no one really knows if it will occur again. Adam had definitely learned something from what he had experienced. But what we did was plain cruelty. We turned our backs and we ganged up on him, even made him a laughingstock of the group.

I tried to tell the others, to also enlighten their minds, but to no avail. They were still too hurt to see me eye to eye. Ace agreed with me somehow, but told me that we were past the point of no return, that the friendship was already irreparable, and that we didn't need Adam anymore. This saddened me, but I respected their opinions nevertheless. Though from then onwards, I learned an important lesson: how to be a friend a great one deserves.